I Like Pie

This is Banana Berry Pie. You should totally make some if you have the time.

Since I've already done posts on cupcake hats, chocolate hats and cake hats, it stands to reason that I ought to do a post on pie hats. No, not Pi hats--I did that back in March--but pie hats; hats crafted in homage to that flaky food of the gods.

Sounds like a great idea, right? That's what I thought, except that after much gleaning of Google Image Search, I have come to conclude that very few people feel that pie is worth rendering in hat form. And Internets, that is just NOT ON.

I mean, what the crap? Think about it: what would life be like without pie? We'd have to think of something else to serve a la mode, for a start. We'd also be deprived of the awesome that is the microwavable chicken pot pie. Heck, America as a whole would lose its identity without pie, because we've convinced ourselves that nothing typifies our country like our maternal figure's home-made apple pie. And that's not even touching upon the fact that one of the hallmarks of our holiday season is pumpkin pie; skip the pie, and all we've got left to look forward to is fruitcake.

If that last bit didn't make you shudder, there is something seriously wrong with you. Like, you might just be made of pure evil. You should get that checked out.

And sure, you could argue that nature abhors a vacuum and that we would most likely come up with something to fill the void that would normally be occupied by pie, but I just want you try to imagine life without all these pies. Just try it, and see if it doesn't strike terror in your heart.

So what is wrong with us? Are we--as a people--taking pie for granted, or is the answer a little less worrisome than that? Maybe it's just that not enough people know how to make pie hats, and that's why there aren't many of them out there. I could handle the latter; the former would keep me awake at night.

Luckily for us, ladylinoleum of Monster Crochet is here to save the day. She's created patterns for all sorts of pie hats (she calls 'em "pie-rets,") and is willing to share them with the world. Just look at a sampling of her wares:

We've got a cranberry-orange pie-ret, complete with lattice crust...

...A pecan pie-ret...

...And even a pumpkin pie-ret, complete with whipped cream!

HOORAY! THE DAY IS SAVED!

In short, you should totally get these patterns and whip up some pie-rets. Tweak 'em to make whatever kind of pie suits your fancy. Just remember; you're not just doing this for yourself, but for humanity. To remind us that life without pie would be a very bleak experience.

Also; I wouldn't be able to post pictures like this:

Just think about that.

See you Friday!